Posts Tagged ‘ marriage ’

Understanding

So I’ve finally gotten a little bit more writing done.  It is by no means a huge amount, but it got a story a little bit more clear in my head.  Huzzah for the wife having a night out with co-workers.  I mean, sure, I love her and all but alone time can be greatly appreciated.

Along the lines of the marriage action, I was thinking about fighting with the wife and how no matter what, no matter the communication used(even if done in small words acting like children) the other person always feels that the other just did not understand what was being said by the other.  I’ve decided that this is because men and women understand the understanding of being understood differently.   How’s aboot that for a mouthful?  Essentially I suppose it is by no means a surprise to anybody that we definitely think differently.  Maybe I will just be thought of as an idiot for even saying this aloud(ish) but either way I’m typing it because this is my blog beeeeches.  So my epiphany if you will was that men understand it all intellectually while women understand it emotionally.  Both have a smack of the other bit in them, but on the whole men are emotionally dense, so understand the intellectual bits of the talk more.  And in my experience, most women focus more on the how something made them feel(with lots of examples) than going into the logic of the fight.  So when the argument is all said and done, and I’m being told that I don’t understand, well I don’t have that emotional depth that you do so obviously not.

That may seem sexist I suppose, but it is what I’ve noticed in my own personal encounters.  I have a story that has not been touched by me since January, but no real progress made on it in almost a year.  It is getting a little pissy with me, but I’ve been waiting for it to age.  Waiting for it to take better shape in my head.  Waiting for myself to be able to write more in it.  It is a story very close to me.  Well.  Bits of it.  Well I mean. It is all close to me, but that doesn’t mean I have lived it, maybe.  It is tough to explain.  I started writing it when going through a really difficult time.  I did not finish the story before that time passed on and for the most part resolved itself.  Unfortunately for me(well somewhat) I was not in the mindset I had been when starting  so the progress pretty well just came to an end.  I still very much wanted to finish the story for it taunts me so, knowing that it has full shape and form and ending just waiting to be put down.  But it scares me.  It scares me that I may have to put myself into that mindset forcibly, and that dark place worries me a bit.  On the other hand well, it may not be that hard.  At least getting there.  The getting back is another story.  I think I may have grown up enough to tackle it again though.  So we will see shortly.

For now, as the end of most blog posts it seems like, I must bid you adieu and PTFO so that I can arise with the sun and curse violently that I am doing so

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Being Busy and OCD

So I fail a lot at updating lately.  It has really been work, play with son, entertain company, and work some more the past few days.  I suppose 4 to be more exact.  I have been working more than normal(OT ka-ching) but it is mostly self induced, which sucks because it is taking away from writing.  I gave myself a large project though, and have been making everything I can to finish it even at home.  Have been putting in a couple hours a night to work on it.  It essentially converting an entire library to match with another one.   Yay me.

I’ve been trying to do some thinking lately.  Trying being the key word.  Finishing any thought fully has been elusive.  My brain has been all over.  I still haven’t been sleeping right.  Have been waking up sometimes for not apparent reason multiple times a night.   Other nights I have a reason, like my son climbing in bed and kicking me in the face.  That is a pretty good reason to wake up methinks.

Sunglasses.  I recently bought the first pair I have had in the last ten years or so.  It’s one of those things I had been putting off.  Just squint right?  So I got a pair.  I have mixed emotions though.  I like the fact of not having to squint a lot, but on the other hand I feel as though it is making my eyes pansies.  They want to hurt and whine at the slightest extra brightness now.  So I dunno.  Maybe I’m just a pansy?

Writing.  Well we can all see how that has been going.  I still have a good 5-7 ongoing stories.  This goes back to my focus issues.  It also relates to how I best write.  Each of the different stories going invoke a separate emotion in me.  I may be a guy and have the emotional depth of a rock when compared to the female of the species, but I do still have at least a couple of them, and they build up because, well, frankly, I don’t always open up.  I have this awesome habit of holding emotions in.  Believe it stems from a fear of actually connecting to somebody else.  To truly open yourself up to another being is scary shit.  Maybe it shouldn’t be that way.  I am married so I should be good at it right? Well.. not so much.  I still open up a little bit at a time.  There are still things that are rolling around my head that will probably never see the light of day.  But not to derail.  Each story that is currently in the works helps me to try and release one of each of my pent up emotions.  I don’t have to have that to write, but it does help.  That is part of why one of them hasn’t gone terribly far in over a year, because I have worked through some of the issues that were being caused at that time, but also I buried some others.  I need to stop that.  I need to open up to myself goddamnit.  How screwy is it that I have issues even with that?  Blargh.

Lighter news.  My best friend is getting married.  That is fantastic.  I hope the best for him.  I also hope I can give a…. appropriate speech.  I at times have issues with a filter, which could be bad in a room of people I don’t know.  I mean I can guess that starting off by saying, “It takes a special kind of woman to get him ready for marriage and congrats at being the fifth one, hope it sticks!”  I could see how that could get me hit, but at the same time I would laugh.  I suppose that it’s not a situation that my laughter is the most important though.  Also shouldn’t say too much more on that since he will be reading this I’m sure.  I guess it will just be an awesome surprise.  My vows that I write for him/her.  To join in to their relationship.  Sexy-like.

Bow shicka wow wow.  I’m out for now.  I will try for a more focused blog tomorrow.  Hell I will even try to make notes so that I remember what the hell I wanted to say.  Had a blog post planned out this morning at work and got a pad of paper to write it down.  Somebody asked me a question. And. Blankness.  *goes to a spanish accent* son oof a beesh.

Dreams, Science Fiction, and Super Mario

Dreams. We all have them and supposedly they are your mind working through all the different information that it has come across.  So what does it mean when you have a dream about your wife banging one of your best friends, who is magically hung like my forearm, while a super religious friend watches, you other best friend calls to try and offer support and she gleefully tells him that she is leaving you.  Score one for becoming an alcoholic writer?

Oh and that’s not the best part, the best part is the theme music to the dream.  I thought that it was something common, but my wife says that she never has music in her dreams. Do you?  Every one of my dreams has theme music.  This one’s theme music was the intro to Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.  Needless to say, it was a fairly messed up dream.  Interrupted only by my three year old getting into bed with us around 3am and kicking me square in the manhood that seemed so lacking in that dream.  A pleasant awakening.

Hm.  On to the next subject, anybody notice how Super Mario is like Hitler?  Now follow me for just a minute.  What did Hitler eat for breakfast? That’s right, Jewish babies.  Now what does Mario eat to super-size him? Mushrooms.  Don’t seem that connected?  Well what about Toad and all of his people?  I firmly believe that you are supposed to be saving their babies from the evil Bowser, and instead you eat them because they give you the awesome power that Bowser is trying to get for himself.

Also, what is up with everybody hating Science Fiction?  Not one good Sci-Fi series has lasted lately? No more SG1, Farscape, Firefly, SGU or many others, WTF guys?

Last bit of news that I found to have extremely mixed feelings about, but mostly negative.  Seth MacFarlane will be redoing the Flintstones for a release in the next year or two.  I don’t think that meshes well..  Family Guy humor in the Flintstones.. Hm… What do you think?

AL

Things I’ve learned, RSS, and Comments

*Don’t start a haircut with clippers that aren’t fully charged, especially if you have somewhere to go right after.
*Don’t play hide and seek with a babysitter not interested in playing. Along with that I must also insist that you not hide in the dryer. This is absolutely imperitive if your babysitter smokes and she likes to go in the laundry room to start the dryer to make it seem like she is doing something. 
*Sometimes it is best to listen to friends when they say “Don’t watch this” especially if the title is along the lines of 1 guy 1 screwdriver.
*Don’t watch the three stooges with your three year old son, especially if your testicles are somewhat important to you.
*If a condom breaks, a sock is not equally as effective, also it doesn’t make your ladies vageen feel terribly well.
*Sometimes when somebody says that something is hot, it actually is.
*Playing with fire in the backyard during summer isn’t terribly smart.  Also if playing with fire and pouring items on it to catch fire as well, don’t pour rubber cement onto an open flame. It just might not pour fast enough.
*When married, 95% of fights can be avoided by simply saying “I’m sorry and it’s my fault” Although pride, defiance, and knowledge otherwise may often get in the way
*It takes a woman 7 years to heal up and be almost virginal. It takes a guy 7 days to go back to lasting as long as a virgin(although some are just blessed enough to always last that long aha)

Sooo yeaah, those are some things that readily come to mind at any rate.  Some other things I wanted to mention are that RSS feeds are great. There’s even a feed from my site *wink wink nudge nudge* I even RSS myself and get excited to read my own posts.  Depending on the frame of mind it can seem like somebody else wrote it.  Hope that’s not early dementia.  Another thing about the blog is that I’m hoping to attract a community of fellow readers and writers to share ideas with.  So essentially I’m lonely and have no friends.  I guess that what I’m saying is that if anything I say sparks any bit of interest let me know, let others know, let your mom know.  Definitely let her know.
Comments can be wonderful when people aren’t just being jackasses, although they can be wonderful as well; oh so fun to make fun of.

Off to enjoy the company of my wife, or at least let her touch me. Or even more likely let her read as I attempt to flush out my creative juices(writing, not bating)

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